Not as easy as I thought

Now that the hustle and bustle of Christmas has passed I can go over what happened. Josh had his graduation luncheon on 12/14/07...it went well. It was, in my humble opinion, a little too casual. There was really no formal recognition of the kids and their hard work...just some introductions and some Subway and just like that, it was over. Then we had Jared's birthday on the 15th...he turned 8. On the 20th, we had our Wright/Fitzgerald Christmas Party. It was great!! A ton of people and a ton of food!! What more can a Wright ask for??? Then, of course, we had Christmas and 2 days later my parents got here. Two days after that our best friends from California came in, Jared was baptized, and we threw Josh his going away/graduation party(I would never suggest doing all of that in one day to anyone). Two days later, on the 31st, was New Years Eve where my mother and I spent all day making tamales, our friends left, and we rung in the New Year with My parents and Josh's girlfriend, Michelle. Josh was scheduled to leave on the 2nd but his recruiter called and said that it had been postponed to the 3rd and to enjoy one more day with Josh.
On the 3rd, at 5am, in the blink of an eye, my Josh was gone. His recruiter came to the door, allowed enough time for Josh to hug his grandparents, Steve, and I only once and out the door they went. I mean, we didn't really have time for tears or sadness. I felt somewhat guilty. I didn't cry and I didn't really feel that sad. I went back to bed and an hour later was up with the other kids for their 1st day back to school. This was also my first day back to work. It was a really busy day for me. The following day, Friday, was my parents last day here and my mom and I did lots of shopping and running around. That night, my brother came over to say bye to my parents. He asked if I was doing okay with Josh being gone and much to my surprise, I was.
My parents left early Saturday morning. They didn't wake me to say goodbye...just up and left. When I finally decided to open my eyes, it was about 10:15. The kids and I did some chores and Steve sent me to Costco for some new phones. It was a really mellow, relaxing, peaceful day. I thought I could use some alone time as my life had been inundated with people for the past 2 weeks so off to Costco I went. It was in the Costco parking lot as I parked my car, alone, with no one to keep my mind off of it, that it hit me....MY BABY IS GONE!!! For the next 6 months, I won't have my Josh. He is my biggest headache and my biggest helper; my worst complainer and my best alarm clock. He truly is my buddy. For those of you that know me well, and those of you that don't, I fall under the statistic of "Babies having babies". We grew up together!! Josh has been in my life longer than most anyone I know, including my hubby!! Everything that I have been thru as an adult, Josh has been thru with me. We have talked, cried, and laughed together for the past 17 and a half years AND right there in the Costco parking lot, I lost it!! It happened 2 more times that day while talking with friends (sorry Chandra, sorry Lori). I'm a wreck!! What am I doing??? Wrights aren't supposed to cry!!
The house is so much different without a loud, smart allic, teenager. Even the younger ones have noticed. I think everyone is really missing him. Today, we all had dinner and by 7:00 2 of the kids were sleeping. Justin being one of them. Jared was not far behind and Steph was pretty quiet. The Wright house that everyone knows and loves is just not the same. This won't be as easy as I thought.